What is happening to me...

I am writing this post... not even sure I will hit "publish" and if I do...  when will I do it...

I need to write this because I need to understand what is happening to me... and I found over the years that writing does just that...

When I started this blog in January 2011, there was 10 people reading it on good days... and that was OK with me because I was shy of writing... thinking I was not a good writer....

Then I went off and wrote an article for a yoga web site...
And got talked into writing a book...  Life Happens ...

Following my book being publish and having got a few good comments, I felt like it was an important book that could change the world... and followind advices from different people, I "created" myself on all social medias...  and wrote more and more on my blog...  created a Facebook page and tried selling more and more copies...  In becoming "public", even to a small scale, I decided I wanted to change the world! And became obsessed with it...

Obsessed with the numbers...
Obsessed with the visible results...

To a point where I lost myself...

To a point where my life was social medias... everything I did was for posting... everything I wrote or tought or saw... had to be social media material...  to create more traffic... to attract more people... and get bigger numbers!

And then it was no longer fun... and in wanteing to change the world to "free" people, I became emprisonned in my own dream!

I am still Minimalist Vegan Nath...  this name was created because it represented who I was...  I could also have thrown in Minimalist Vegan Yogini Nath... but then it would have been too long...

I love that name and what it represent.... and I still wish the world would be different... in a way...  but I am no longer blinded by this obsession...  Yes I still wish every one would take up yoga (in it's wholeness), became vegan and minimalists...

I truly, firmly believe that THIS would save this planet and give hope to our kids...  I truly believe that THIS is the only way...  to save oursleves...

I am however no longer obsessed with numbers and social medias...  I am no longer obsessed with creating results... and converting people...  I have had so many deceptions... and so many dreams shaterred that I decided to concentrate on myself... and my husband and son....

We came to Moncton and everything changed....  in being free from expectations of others...  in being distant from eveyone I know...  in being able to be me...  truly me.... I found who "Me" is....  and who "Me" was all along...  And I love "ME"...

And I still wish I could do more... I still wich I could influence more people... and inspire more individual to take up veganism and minimalism... and even though I know this is what will happen if I continue, I know it will take time.... more time then I would have wished for because I cannot market myself good enough... only because I am against marketing in general... therefore I have to go with word of mouth....

and lead by example...

Therefore I decided I would be 100% of the time... 100% Minimalist Vegan Yogini Nath and hope that whoever likes and is inspired will slowly make changes to their life... and perhaps talk about me... and start a cascade.... if I can only change a handful of people, I will have change the world... and that my friends, would be good enough for a nobody!!!

And this is it...  and I do not know how many people will read this as it will not be advertise on FB nor Pinterest like I ususally do... if I ever hit "publish"
It is for true fans only I believe...

It is my soul ripped opened!

love&peace,
from Minimalist Vegan Yogini Nath! 
xox