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Tuesday, May 14, 2013

My box of chocolate

I am currently living a stressful moment...  and there is nothing I can do about it..  it is not under my control!!!  So how do I deal with it?

Well first of all, I try to keep busy... so it changes my mind!!!  But I am not one to run around crazy just for the fun of it!  So what do I do in quiet times??? I try!

I came across an email from my friend Maryse at Diva Yoga who was talking about the equilibrium between controlling and letting go... and it made me think...  In this situation I am living right now, I do have control over some of it... so, that, I need to take care off!  And I am...  When something is under your control, you need to address it...  you need to do what needs to be done!  You can't rely on anyone else to do it!  To me, this is not a problem...  However, the part I need to let go....  because I do not have control over it...  THAT is the problem...  and I was wondering why...  I mean, I know we do not control much in our lives... I know everything turns out just for the best...  So why the fuss?   Why am I freaking out over this?  Because I am not in control?  partly yes... I must admit!  I would go there right now and DO myself the part I am not in control off and it would be done!   But could I really?  No... this thing I am waiting for... is not something I am good at doing... or qualified to do...  so I could not do it!  So how can I assume that I could just go and do it faster then others? I couldn't...  I have to let go!!!  But why is it so hard???  Because I feel like I am not in control...  because I am impatient...  because this thing I am waiting for will have an impact on my life...  and I would like to move on... I feel like I am on PAUSE right now... but I am really?  Is there such a thing as PAUSE in real life???  Not so much...

Therefore I need to let go...  and live the present moment... not be on PAUSE...  what if I was missing on great moments or opportunities because I am freaking out about something I have no control on?

Well I do that...  I can let go.. when I am with other people...  having discussions...  because I dedicate myself to those discussions...  my issue is when I am with myself... why can't I do it then? 

I did improve on that subject however... I use to not be able to let go even when I was with other people... now I can...  I have to learn to let go when by myself!!!   In quietness...  and how do I do that???  I am trying meditation... I am trying to focus on my breathing and listening to what goes on in my body....  and it works.... on and off...  it's a work in progress! 

I also have to learn to trust life more...  after all it did bring me where I am now in my life... even if the path may not be the one I had chosen, it was a great path and I love the outcome! Sometimes Life knows better than we do!

Remember Forrest Gump?  "Life is like a box of chocolate, you never know what to expect"

Isn't that a sweet way to see it?   What "chocolate" will I pick up next?  Who knows... but I will "eat" it...  and it will help me go to the following place in my life...  where I should be.... where I have to be!!!

What about you?  Are you waiting for a "chocolate" while missing out on other stuff?  Are you waiting to pick a specific one while throwing the other ones out or letting them melt away? Or are you just enjoying them one by one as they are picked?

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love and peace,

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