Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Dress with less - project 333 - may to september 2014


We are getting close to the end of April...  end of a month, means having to get my clothes for the following month selected and sorted out. 

If you remember, I had 33 items in my April wardrobe but only 15 items in my March wardrobe.

In March I wanted to challenge and test myself!  in April, I felt like including more to give more options!

In retrospect, this was a very interesting experiment... actually proving, in contrary to what I was expecting, that in regards to clothes, I am always very critical and indecisive!

I have mixed emotions!

1) I feel like I have too much clothes overall
2) I wish I had more... on some days....  OK maybe not more, but different!
3) When I am away from temptations (read here: magazines, malls, shops) I am perfectly happy with my clothes... but when I am closer to the "devil", I  want to shop!  Only difference with before is that I can now rationalize myself and not buy anything in most cases!
4) I can't let go of anymore clothes.... I really love them all at this point!
5) I am having a "bad" day, I should definitely stay away from shopping areas!

In March I got tired of my 15 items...  there was not enough options and not enough colors...  in April, I doubled my wardrobe... but realise by the end of the month that I may have wore 15 items most of the times... and the reminder on a few occasions only! What is the saying? that we wear 20% or our wardrobe 80% of the time?  Well, I can honestly say that I wore 50% of my wardrobe 80% of the time! Whereas in March, I wore 100% or it 100% of the time! Interesting...

Although, less makes me feel unsatisfied, more means I won't use all of it! And not necessarily be more satisfied!
What do you think of that?
It confuses me....  not sure what conclusion to draw yet! Any suggestion?

Do I like to have to have stuff just for the sake of it???  Do I just like to know that I have options? Have I not learned anything over the past years???

Now in May, I want to do different....  because the weather here is not improving so much... it still feels like late winter or very early spring!  I know by experience when we have such a bad April, we may end up switching the jeans and warm jacket for flip flops, shorts and tank top! Therefore selecting items for May is challenging... and quite frankly I have a LOT of clothes that can apply for late spring, summer and early fall!  Of course the items listed in this post will be included in my May wardrobe.  Another thing is that I am getting tired of selecting items every month...  doing so for 5 months will give me a break!

But what I really wish to do is take all the remaining items in my wardrobe and put them to test.  Therefore, all the items in the following 3 pictures will be part of my wardrobe starting now until the end of September!  5 months total!

And what I did is I have hang everything with the hanger reverse to what we usually do (I did after I took the picture so you can't see it here)...  like all my clothes are facing backwards...  every time I wear something and like how I feel and do not force myself to wear it in order to "save" the item, I will turn the hanger around... what ever has not been worn by the end of September will still be "backwards" and hence donated to charity!




All in all, without footwear... but including scarves, which are not in the pictures, this is a grand total of 52 items.  Some have been with me for a few seasons past already... they are just very versatile and can adapt from one season to another... 

I can't wait to see what happens with this number of items!  In September I will let you know... 

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786

Monday, April 28, 2014

the monkey story

A couple of weeks ago my husband came home with a story he heard and said I might like it.  It is called the "monkey story".  It is supposedly not a new story but I had never heard of it so it was new to me.

As you may know already, I do not believe in coincidences. Everything happens for a reason and I thought it was funny that I heard of that story at that time in my life and even more so on that week.

A few days later I got Chris Guillebeau's "The art of non-conformity".  Guess what?  At the beginning of his book, he tells the same story!

 
Now that can't be a coincidence!  The same story AGAIN!  Only with more details...

let me tell you the story in my own works:

A not-so-nice scientist wanted to do an  experiment on monkeys to see how you can explain their behavior as  a group.  He put a few monkeys in a cage with some food in a bowl on the floor.  Just ordinary food and just enough for the number of monkeys. He also hanged some bananas on the top of the cage and placed a ladder leading to the bananas.  The bananas were reachable for the monkeys.  Guess what?  Soon enough a monkey used the ladder to get the bananas.  The thing was that the not-so-nice scientist, made it so that as soon as the bananas would be touched, all the monkeys down on the floor would receive some water and become wet. Over time, no monkeys even tried getting the bananas because at one point in time the ended up wet and didn't like it. Eventually, the not-so-nice scientist, switch one of the monkey.  The new monkey did not knew about the water therefore he tried getting the bananas only to find out that all the other monkeys would go crazy and absolutely try to keep him from doing it.  One by one, all the monkeys were replaced with none of the new monkeys ever have been wet but having learn by peers not to use the ladder the reach for the bananas.   Not knowing why, none of the monkey even tried reaching for the bananas which may seem like a normal gesture for a monkey!

End of story.

Isn't that crazy???  This obviously is about conditioning.  The monkeys that got wet and didn't like it, prevented any other monkey to use the ladder to reach the bananas.  The new monkeys, without knowing why, because they never got wet, learned that they could not access the bananas using the ladder and even worse... NEVER EVEN TRIED!

If we truly are like monkeys.... this is a really scary story for us too!

What type of conditioning are we under? What got handed down to us without us even asking why? Even questioning the behavior/gesture that we adopted even since we were born? Are the people that conditioned us even aware of what they did?  How are we conditioning our children?

Do you realise that most 3 years old kids will ask "why" a thousand times per day?  Do we still do that at 10? 20? 30?...  Of course not.... because we were shut down...  we were told "because" as the answer to our "why?".  We stopped asking... even ourselves!

If monkeys can be conditioned with water... can you imagine how easily we can be conditioned by authority? parents? education system? publicity?
Even more so that no one, no longer realize what is going on...

I am not blaming or accusing anyone!  Hey, I stopped asking "why" myself a long time ago (only recently did I start again).... and I also answered "because" on a few occasions!  Not that I am proud of it... and I am tying to reverse this pattern with my son but as a blogger, I felt an urge to open  your eyes on that subject!

How we going through life as zombies?  Have we any clue of all we could do it we would not let a few drops of water stops us?  If we would questions our actions or non-actions more? if we would not let our peer dictate what we should or should not do? If our natural desires would not have been shut down? If our ambitions were still there?  If we still had dreams?

If you dream of reaching for the bananas, why wouldn't you? Who's to say that water will always be poured? Why not find a way to get the bananas without water for the down-below monkey as a result?

If you want your bananas, I say you go and get them!!!  Do not let any other monkey tell you you shouldn't... or you can't! Try for yourself!

What is your banana?  What will you go get once you put down this post?

if you liked this post please share it with 3 monkeys in your cage!  :-)

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786











Friday, April 25, 2014

8 things I learned from minimalism


Today I want to share with you what I learned from my journey into minimalism.

1) It is much easier to write and read about it than actually doing it!

When I started reading about minimalism, I was like "well that sounds really easy, just get stuff out the door".  "I just need time to do it."  Now when I first started to actually try and get rid of stuff, it wasn't THAT easy.   Excuses, feelings, what if, but... these are all works I used over and over again!  For example:
- this was really expensive (excuse)
- but it reminds me of...(feeling)
- what if I need it in 6 months when I might have people over for x...
- but it looks good with this

Sounds familiar??? Trust me, being expensive is not a reason to keep anything you no longer like or use - it only brings guilt! As for memories, they won't go away with the object!  They are forever engraved in your hearth!

When I started writing about minimalism in January 2011 on this blog, I was thinking "OK, now I know what I am doing, I should share"... but I had no clue!  OK, I knew more then when I actually started the process in June 2007 but I had a lot to learn still.... and if you read my past posts on minimalism, you'll see that it was a roller coaster!

For all I know, I am getting closer and closer to my objective but I am not quite there yet... so I still have stuff to learn... and therefore I will keep writing! :-)


2) It will most likely not work the first or second or even third time around

You give, you wait and you buy something... once, twice or even more....  it looks like for every few items you give, there is always a few less, but still, a few, finding their way back into your home.  My thinking on that is that emptiness is scary.  It takes time to be comfortable in an empty room, or with an empty closet... or an empty space of any type.  Empty spaces makes you feel like you are missing something... like something needs to be filled.  However, once you get use to it, you love empty space of any kind...  you breathe easier and in the end it seems like nothing is ever empty enough!

Give it time.  And if you fill the space back, that's OK... eventually, it'll be empty again when you are ready.

3) It takes time

It won't happen overnight! Our spaces, agenda, social life are filled to the last shelf space and last time slot!  Unless you move across the planet and are forced not to bring anything or anyone with you, it won't happen by tomorrow...  It's a slow process that requires work on yourself because...

4) The psychological dimension is much bigger than anything else

Anyone can physically empty a closet, get rid of an extra couch, clear items in their calendar...  but when you come to think of it, #1) comes back really fast.  We accumulated stuff over time for a reason... gifts, souvenirs, memorabilia first of all but also because we are expected to do it.  It is normal to finish school, find a job, get a car, then a house and fill it up!  This is what people do! (until they retire and then sell the house, get rid of the extra stuff and move into a smaller place while still paying debt most likely - do you see the irony?)  When you start doing the reverse process (getting rid of stuff well before your retirement when you are actually expected to still accumulate) it raises all kind of questions and emotions within yourself and around you too!

And don't even get me started with clearing up week ends so you have time to do nothing... clearing up friends list because they no longer agree with who you've become... These are very difficult to do.  Even painful sometimes. Actually all the times.

It makes you wonder:
- am I normal?
-am I depress?
-why do I no longer want this?
- why do I no longer get along with... ?
-why do I like having all this free time?

It makes you wonder because you feel different!

You get to know another side of yourself... a good side but nonetheless it needs to be tame. 
It takes time and you can't do all of it at once. You'll need to work on yourself...  find WHO you truly are... who is behind all that busyness? who were you before they told you who you should be?

5) You really do not need all the stuff

How much stuff do you have and never use?  Do you actually know everything you own?  If you open a closet or go to the garage or the attic can you list everything that is in there without forgetting anything?  Honestly?  Do you have unpack boxes form you last move 6 months ago? How much stuff have you not use in over a year? 2 years? 5 years?

Do you have a storage unit?  When was the last time you went there? How far is it from your home?  How much does it cost you?  Does that make sense?

6) You really do not miss the stuff you let go off

In due time, you'll come to the conclusion that all that stuff you gave away, you no longer even think about it.  If you were to make a list of it a few months down the line, you'd probably forget most of it! You'll also realise that you enjoy much more the items you actually kept because you end up using them. And they are the items you actually really truly love!

Your home will be "cleaner" in all sense of the words - the energy will flow through it and you'll feel better.

7) You do not get bored on an empty agenda

When I started cleaning my agenda, I was afraid I would get bored. I actually did not!  And quite the opposite....  I panic now if there's a week where I have 2 or more appointments..  or if I have something important to do on Saturday AND Sunday!  I like to have evenings at home with no plans and one day of the week end to just walk around, read, and do nothing!  I need those moments - I need those to recharge my battery!  How can you recharge if you're always taking up some juice?  How do you have time for yourself, for doing stuff that you really care about if you are busy 12h a day? What added value does it have to run from A to B then C...  never endlessly? Are you really doing this for yourself? Does it serve another purpose then "looking good"?

Try it, for the month of May, empty one day of the week end and only "plan" for stuff you really like and actually serves no other purpose but to make you feel good about yourself.

8) Really important people  in your life can be counted on the fingers of one hand at any one point in time

When you enter minimalism, or change your lifestyle in any significant way, you'll see who really does matter to you... and who you matter to! Not every one will understand and be supportive but that's OK!  It actually helps cleaning your agenda and contact list! And by creating room around yourself, you'll attract new people that are more in line with your new values/principles and won't expect so much time from you!

People, like money, like stuff, are energy: they are meant to move around us.  We should not be attached to them anymore then to a couch or a pair or pants (I am not saying here that stuff is more important then people, people will bring us experience, lessons and memories, but what I want you to understand is that we tend to get attach to people more than we should - no one will be in our life for ever - except our self)! People should go in and out of our lives... they are there for us for a while like we are there for them for a while... and then we move on and so do they!  We learned and we build, hopefully, good memories and a stronger self.

I hope this will help you in your journey! I know I would have loved to know that a few years ago...

I do not know precisely where each one of you stand on minimalism but I find that those 8 points, are very useful for myself - I still remind myself of them quite regularly as this is a life process not a project!  It will never end therefore it's good to be reminded!

Is there anything else that this process helped you discover about yourself?  About life?


thanks for reading!  and sharing!

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786








Thursday, April 24, 2014

On being vegan or not... but absolutely being nice about it!



Hello!

It's vegan Thursday again!!!  Yay!!

Today's post is intended to be a reflection on the choice we all make in life and how we deal with it!  Hopefully this post will rock a few boats... 
I know it is something that I have been discussing about with a few vegan and non-vegan alike and we seemed to agree... but I know it will not be the case for everyone.

It is about something that really makes me sad... and the naive me likes to think that it can change with this simple post!

Without further due...

I am vegan.  I have been since March 1st 2013.
Before that I had been vegetarian since October 2007.

I have all kind of friends, followers and readers...  vegetarian, vegan, omnivore...  and meat and potato people too! And I truly appreciate and love each one of them! They are the reason I am doing what I am doing.

I took the decision to go vegetarian and then vegan for health reasons to start of with.  If you want to know more about that you can read my book Life Happens.  This is not the purpose of this post.
Then by reading more and more about it, I found out about the animal suffering and the benefit to the environment. 

I am vegan and will remain vegan.
I have non vegan friends and I wish to keep them...
I have vegan friends and I wish to keep them...
In most instances they are nice people... and we respect each other's decision to be or not to be vegan.

I truly believe that respect is the base for every relationship.

I truly believe that there are not better vegan than others.  Vegan is vegan. Whether you advocate animal suffering.. whether you're an activist or not... you're vegan. Even if you "only" do it for health reasons... the reason or the way to do it is NOT what matters most - the end result it!

I truly believe that vegan are not better than vegetarian. Only different!  But everyone is different!

I also truly believe that vegan are not any better than non-vegan : they simply made a different life choice.  And vice-verse. 

I also truly believe that vegan is a healthier choice.  So is not smoking... not drinking... and not doing drugs! 
Can we change this overnight?  Absolutely not!
Do I wish we could?  Of course!

If I could, with the snap of my fingers, change this planet, it would turn smoke free, alcohol free, drug free and vegan overnight!  But this is not going to happen!  Let's be realistic.

All we can do, as vegan is do what we know best - BE VEGAN. 

And be nice about it!  There is not point in judging non-vegan...  there is no point in unfriending them or unfriending not-vegan-enough people... this only makes us look like a bunch of 5 years old!

If you want to change the world, you have to be a model... you have to be loved... you have to be someone people want to be!  You have to be someone people can relate to! Not someone that scares people away... or that people despise! Not someone that people do not want to identify with... 

Change takes time!  And we do have time... not much but we do.  Let's stop wasting it with arguments with each others. Every small step is  a step in the right direction!

We should stick together... we should be nicer... not as judgemental...

Vegan are compassionate people - so I thought...  let's show that side of us! 

Some of us say we are doing this for the animals... to end their suffering... well guess what?  Humans are animals too... and being vegan does end their suffering...  as long as we (vegans) do not create it! Let's help make a change, not scare people away.

I am asking vegans to be nicer...  I am asking vegans to show a united front!  Who would want to join a team that can't even stick together?

Please...  for humans... for animals... and for the planet...  let's work together! Not against each other in a meaningless competition that no one will win!

Who's in with me???
Who wants to make this planet a better place to live on???

p.s. if you are not vegan, this still applies to you...  in the sense that as human, we tend to believe that we are better than others... well guess what?  you are not! No one is...  we are all more or less the same...  but different nonetheless... Look at your behaviors... take a deep look at your actions... which ever team you are in (vegan, non-vegan, sports team, at work,  lifestyle)... are you a good team member? Are you a role model?  Are you compassionate? Do you help other? Do you respect your team mate or non-team mate decisions?  This is the only way out of the situation we are in!

By the way, if you want today's breakfast recipe, please go to www.veganrestaurantfinder.com it will be right there!
Here's a picture of what it looks like:



thanks for reading!  and sharing!

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786


Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Thrift shopping and a capsule wardrobe

Hello!

On March 18th, I had share with you 2 items I bought and I thought were really good deals.  However, some suggested that I could find much better deal at thrift stores. And I think they are probably right... You can read about my 2 items and why I thought it was a good deal here.

Following the comment, I had challenge myself to go into a thrift store, buy an item and wear it in 3 different ways... 
You can read about my challenge here.

Now it's time for me to hand in the results...
I did ask around about thrift stores...
I did go into 3-4 of them...
BUT, I did not find anything I really liked, that fit me, that seem to be my style and that was at a reasonable price.

I did find an amazing dress that was 35$.  I can find new stuff for the same price or much lower!

Maybe I went into the wrong shops...  maybe I did not know what to look for...  maybe it was a timing issue... but still I failed with that challenge.

I know I won't have time to go back before the end of the week...  so this is it!

To be quite honest, I felt weird into those store.  Like if I was in the wrong place... like if I did not belong.  I got the feeling that I was taking something away from someone who needs it more than me and that can't afford to pay higher price. It's probably just me but this is how I felt.

I will try again...  I know... because the fact of not buying new does appeal to me since no new material is used up and it seems so much more ecological and economical! Not to mention ethical with all the sweat shops creating our clothes today.

Maybe there are a few tricks I am not aware of when going into thrift stores!
I will give it another try...

In the meantime, I still used my creativity and 15$ to come up with 11 outfits! yes 11!!!

I went into Old Navy and they were having this huge sale. I went in because my teenager son, who grows faster then spring comes, needed clothes!  There was a dress, that was honestly not really me, on sale for 15$! I loved the print it had and the color but not the dress.  Right away I saw I could cut the skirt part of the dress and wear it as a skirt.  Not sewing required as this t-shirt type material. I had done it before!

Here's the dress: it has tiny white flowers on a red/pink background



And here's a close up of the print:

 
I really loved the print... I was looking for something like that for the summer.  I also love this material for summer skirt - it's versatile, not too hot and doesn't need ironing... EVER!
 
 
The only thing I did is cut above the waist and the included belt hold everything in place.
 
I added a few pieces I already own that will be in my May wardrobe and voila! I created all those outfits:
 












Here is the list of items required to create those 11 looks and probably more if you mix and match furthermore!

Skirt
Green scarf
Flower scarf
Navy scarf
Chambray shirt
Denim jacket
Grey vest
Grey long sleeve T
Striped 3/4 sleeve T
Black cami
White cami
Zebra T
Pastel blue T
Navy blue T
Yellow printed T
Black converse
Flip Flop

Can you imagine if I add a few more tops, 2 pairs of  shorts, long jeans and a another skirt I am set for all summer!  Probably with 33 items or maybe less....  I will keep this list in mind while preparing my May wardrobe!  But this leaves me with more summer clothes that would be unused!  Oh my!  Being an ex-shopaholic is not easy... I keep giving away but it seems like there is always more!  lol

I will need to make a few more decisions in regards to my wardrobe!

What do you think of those outfits?  Is there anymore you would create with this skirt?
Is a 15$ investment seems reasonable for his dress turned into a skirt?

Please let me know what you think...

thanks for reading!  and sharing!

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786





Monday, April 21, 2014

Where does your money go - do you budget?


I am addressing today another subject that is taboo.... Money! 

We all know that money does not grow on trees...
We've been told that quite often by our parents!

Today's kids are learning that it doesn't come from the banking machine indefinitely either! When there is no more in the account, the machine won't give you!

We also all know that we need money for stuff...  some is essential and some isn't!

Actual essential needs are: roof over you head, clothes to not be walking around naked and food to nourish you body.

Anything else, including huge houses, designer clothes and expensive food is not! 
Sorry if I am breaking your bubble here.

Now different people have created different need form themselves.  And that's OK!  This is why we have all that stuff available to us.  It's the beauty of living in this day and age.

But, you can't have everything...  you can't keep up with the Joneses.... because there is always someone richer or more willing/capable to go further in debt then you!

You need to prioritize - whether you're a minimalist or not.

Because  the Joneses won't make you happy in the long run!

Have you ever made the calculation of how much it cost you to live on a yearly basis?
Did you ever take the time to break it down and see where you can save in order to put on what is more important to YOU?

I came across a calculation for resident in Quebec recently and it was quite interesting (I am sure similar calculations exist for other places in the world too).  I noted most of it down to use in a post but I seem to have forgotten some numbers...  but essentially, if you live in Quebec and earn 25$ and hour for a 40 our work week, you earn 52000$ a year.

(following number are all approximate of course and based on a family of one. If you are more than one in a home, some costs like clothes and food for example will obviously be doubled or tripled... or even more! Also those number are average - nothing too fancy!))

After income taxes are paid, you have 36 943$ left.

If you own a house (paid 200 000$) it cost you 16 282$ per year
If you own a car (10 000$) it cost you 5 106$ per year
Food 3 600$ per year per person
Telecom 2 200$ per year
Furniture 1 091$ per year
Clothes 1 470$ per year per person
Travel/activity 1 886$ per year for one
Alcohol 637$ per year per adults
Health and beauty 1 142$ per year per adult?!
Other 2 000$ per year - maybe more if you are more than one...
With a few more numbers I did not write down....
The amount of $ left in your pocket at the end of the year is: -1069$ if you live alone and spend the average amount that is "expected" from you!  Now if you have to support others.... can you imagine???

And then you may wonder why your amount of debt increases each year?
We are clearly spending more than we make! And not just here in Quebec! This is pretty much everywhere!  Do you think this is sustainable in the long run?

Now how do you reverse that?  How can you ensure you can work towards your goal? Whatever your goal is, you must have one... other than keeping up with the Joneses! And if you don't, it's time you find one.  It's the only way you'll get out of this cycle.

First, you should know exactly where each penny goes...
I am not necessarily talking about keeping a log of each coffee you buy... or lottery ticket...
I never did that!  I find it unrealistic!!! But to some, that method works.

You  should at least know where the big bucks goes and then figure out what is left for you to spend... on clothes, furniture, travel, activities...  if there is any!  If there isn't, maybe you can/should cut somewhere.

I know that I have worked out to decrease my housing/utilities... a lot!
By not owning a car, I almost half the transportation cost even with 3 bus passes year round.
Food, I am right there in the average, but there is 3 of us - therefore you triple that number.
Health and beauty only include hair cuts and dye for myself: my husband shaves his head and I cut my son's hair.
Furniture, clothes, Travel, Activities gets assign what is left...
And there is no alcohol in this home!

These are the choices I made with my husband to satisfy our lifestyle!

We made those choices because we have priorities we are working towards...  slowly but surely!
Like becoming 100% debt free and doing work we love instead of work that actually causes us to spend more money to relieve stress of a job you do not like!

Have you ever realise that working actually cost you money? Of course you have to work.. we all do!  But what I am saying is that maybe some of the cost it incurs is not money well spent?
Did you know that having a boss you love is worth 10 000$ per year? Having a job you love another 10 000$ per year?  And a job that is less then 30 minutes commute from your home another 10 000$?

How is that so?  Of course you don't actually get an extra 30000$ on your pay check if you love your boss, you job and work close to home... but you actually SAVE 30 000$ per year in stress related expenses... commuting cost and time!

Maybe it's time you look at what you are doing...
Take a look at your job, your budget...
Figure out priorities...
And make choices! YOUR choices... not the one people expect you to make.

This is what being a minimalist is all about!  Choices!  Freedom!
It comes at a price yes...  you have to make choices... Difficult ones sometimes. 
But everything has a price!   You only need to figure out what you are willing to pay!

thanks for reading!  and sharing!

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786

Friday, April 18, 2014

108 things I want my son to remember from me



My friend Tara who hosts this wonderful blog called the Organic sister recently wrote a post of 100+things I hope to teach my son.  I found it so beautiful, I wanted to do the same for my son.

 My son is almost 14 years old.  Sure I have an idea of what kind of legacy I want him to obtain from his mother.  Do I make sure this is actually what he’ll get?  Have I put enough thoughts into that?  Or maybe too much?  

What is our role as parents?

After much thought about my friend Tara’s post, I came up with my own list: my legacy to my son.  What I hope he remembers from all those years we spent together as mother and son.  This was not easy because I hope he grows into being able to make his own decision based on his own thinking.  At the same time, me, like all parents, have values and beliefs and it’s easy to try and force them on my son because I think it might be the best for him.  Where do you draw the line into helping/suggesting and becoming to restrictive and directive?  

I also realize that at this point in my life and his life, I do have some knowledge and experiences he doesn’t… but the reverse is also true!

And quite frankly, I read somewhere that our kids do not belong to us – they are landed to us for a short period of their lives where we need to provide for their essential needs.  If this is the case, what if we already came complete?  What if all we needed to know for this life was already within us when we were born?  What if in all due time what we need came out anyway? This list would then be useless…  But in any case, it makes me feel “important” as a parent to ensure I have a legacy for my son. 

Without further due, here’s the list:

1) men do cry
2) makes them human
3) everything you need is already there within you
4) there are no mistakes
5) just experiences
6) learn and move on
7) do not hurt anyone consciously
8) you will hurt others
9) excuses yourself
10) always question yourself
11) always questions others
12) no one knows everything
13) there is no right or wrong
14) never take anything for granted
15) or anyone
16) not even family
17) ask "why" as often as when you were 3 years old all your life
18) it keeps you from making stupid things
19) don't let anyone step on you
20) they are not worth it
21) you are worth more than that
22) let no one dictate your actions
23) not even your mother
24) or your spouse
25) have dreams - always
26) live your dreams
27) learn all you can
28) learning, what really matters, is NOT done in school
29) although school is mandatory until 16
30) respect is earn by your actions/character
31) not age or status- this works for you and for others
32) go where your spirit calls you
33) leave where you don't belong
34) you do belong somewhere
35) find where
36) and leave it eventually - when time is right
37) go out of your comfort zone
38) do not stay put
39) do not feel stuck
40) speak your mind
41) in due time
42) never fear being who you are
43) you are awesome
44) you are perfect
45) you can improve
46) never give up
47) do not let people down
48) unless it means letting yourself down
49) never ever let yourself down
50) take time off
51) before retirement
52) or it may be too late
53) push yourself
54) find your limits
55) go beyond
56) there are not limits
57) but the one you set yourself
58) learn to live by yourself
59) do not depend on anyone - for anything
60) do not expect anyone to do stuff for you
61) it's not their job
62) do stuff for others
63) it is your job
64) make friends
65) leave friends
66) be your best friend - you'll never be alone
67) find love
68) nourish it
69) it works both ways
70) know when it's time to fall out of love
71) know when it's time to fight
72) and time to leave
73) not everything is worth fighting for
74) know the difference
74) accept thing for what they are
75) then change them if need be
76) make love not war
77) although sometimes war is needed to bring peace
78) and love
79) sometimes running away is the best option
80) for a while - never forever
81) things don't always work out
82) there will be pain
83) you can overcome it
84) you are strong enough
85) forgive - for yourself
86) be considerate
87) remember everyone hurts somehow
88) people react with fear
89) learn to react with love
90) love is all that matters
91) life will surprise you
92) life will build you
93) life will brake you
94) you rebuild yourself
95) only you can
96) only you will
97) be honest
98) always
99) with everyone
100) expect honesty back
101) live YOUR life
102) I will always be there for you
103) you can tell me anything
104) truly
105) one day I will die
106) I'll still be there
107) in your hearth
108) don't be sad


thanks for reading!  and sharing!

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Vegan Thursday - Fake meat and fake cheese... what's up with that?


Last week I asked if you guys had questions in regards of vegan diet... with a little persistence I got one:

Why do we use fake stuff?  Like fake cheese, fake chicken, fake beef, fake cold cuts....

There are a few reasons for that.

First, it depends on your reason for being vegan.

If you are vegan for compassionate reasons towards the animals, you may very well like meat and/or other animal products. In that case, using the fake stuff allows you to eat almost the same way you use too... the texture is different but the taste they manage to fake is amazingly close to the real thing!

If you are vegan for health reasons, there really is no reason why you should eat that other than on an occasional basis - like a treat.  It definitely should not be the basis of your diet.  They are still processed and contain chemicals in the form of flavor and or preservatives. However, they are still healthier then the real thing and can be a good fix! A convenience.

That distinction being made, not all vegan hated meat/animal products to start of with...  I, for one, was never a big fan of it except for a few things (chicken salad, ham, bacon)...  but over time I lost the taste of it.  Same for  cheese and yogurt.  Even the fake version of it doesn't appeal to me so much anymore and if you look into my cookbook, they are very rarely used.

You can compare using these to all the sugar free and fat free stuff some people eat. It doesn't mean it is any healthier but it is appealing to the taste buds!

I can see other reasons why those products are used:

1) To help in the transition - when you become vegan, unless you are well surrounded by other vegans or read a lot on the subject and/or are an exquisite chef, the transition phase can be a pain in the a**! You do not know what to cook... you have cravings you never thought existed - a pregnant women cravings can be nothing compared to that! If on top of that, you are transitioning to veganism by yourself in your household, and not everyone is on board, those products can be a savior in order to not always have to cook 2 different meals. As a matter of fact, I know a LOT of non-vegan who can handle, and actually really like veggie burger, veggie dog, veggie tacos and fake cold cuts!

2) To help in entertaining - if you are inviting people over and like me you no longer can buy and will not tolerate meat in your home, having a few "fake stuff" options for your guests can be an easy way out.  Not everyone will try beans and or green/brown funny smelly things!  And this is what some vegan meal may look like to the non-initiated eye.   Some of your guest will have a sense of a complete meal if there is "meat" served... even if it is fake!

3) Help with the kids. Unless your kids were lucky enough to have never touch animal products or young enough not to remember, using the fake stuff once in a while will ease their acceptation of veganism if they feel like they still have "normal" stuff to hold on too.  Over time, you decrease frequency of their so called "normal" stuff and they won't have such a hard time with it because the will have develop a taste for other stuff (my son loves broccoli in the oven and will kill for tofu cubes in the oven also). Also, when you send lunch to school or have non-vegan friends over, it will also be easier.  Remember, they are kids - they like to blend in once in a while! Even though I really believe in the benefits of veganism for your health, I do understand that growing in a non -vegan environment can be difficult with peer pressure.  Why make it worse? The idea is that eventually they eat a vegan diet by their own choice - if you force them, you might loose them.

So here it is... why we use the fake stuff.  It's not because we do not assume being vegan. At least not in every case.  It is not to be a hypocrite either. It is like fast food.  It feels good once in a blue moon. It helps blending in because not everyone is comfortable standing out - even if they are vegan. And last but not least,  it mostly help transitioning.

Hope this answers that question.

Please let me know if there is anything else you would like to know.  Either here in the comment section, on my Facebook page as a reply or here.

And if you want an excellent recipe that do not contain any fake stuff, check it out here.  It's Thursday therefore I have my guest post on Vegan Restaurant Finder.

thanks for reading!  and sharing!

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Why is it difficult to be a minimalist in this day and age?


I had a nice discussion with my husband this morning over tea and it's funny that Becoming Minimalist and Be more with less posted blogs that were in line, in some way, with our discussion on the very same day.  I have showed that linked above to read original posts if you wish.

We were saying how living a simple lifestyle is not THAT easy in the society we live in... and especially not in a big city.  Yes we downsized a lot over the years... and gave/sold loads of stuff.  But yes, we also had back and forth...  before we could actually feel in control of our buying it took 6 years of that process.  Six years of not buying, giving, selling.... giving in and then buying and accumulating...  always to a lesser extent each time but still.  Maybe we were slow to understand...

We were just trying to put a number over the money we wasted by doing so...  All the stuff we bought in our adult life and ended up selling (at great loss) or giving... And again and again...  Then we decided to let it go!  That stuff that we owned, owned us for so long, now that it is gone, there is no point in regretting what we did.  There is no point in going back, in guilt.  It is what it is.  It's time to let go.

Yes it was LOADS of money, but we chose to see it as an experiment...  What else can we do?  We can't change the past.  We've paid enough (money wise and otherwise), time to move on.  Worse comes to worse, instead of seeing it as wasted money, see it as helping others.  I mean, so many people ended up with what was useless to us but helpful to them.

Now back to this post title in a way: why is it so hard to live here and now?  Because society is based on consumption.  On over consumption.  Companies spend billions of dollar each year to make us feel like we need something. By buying it, we pay for someones salary of course... by buying what they tell us we need, we make the world go round... Or do we???  Those people that manufacture what we buy actually go to work to buy what we want too!  What if there was no need for that item? Would they be happier doing something else with heir lives?  Would you be happier doing something else with yours?

I once spend a week in a country SPA...  no television, no radio, no newspaper, no Internet, no advertisement for 7 days!  Only walking outside, enjoying the woods, the water, the birds and the cats (there was a  mommy cat with her 3 babies - one of them actually had 7 fingers!!! ).  We ate the healthy food that was served to us:  we didn't need anything.  Really. We were calm and at peace. Not once did I think about remodelling my home, buying a new dress, getting a new car... Not once!

This goes to show that to our very core, we do not need stuff! Yes we need a roof over our head, clothes and food. 

But do we need such a big roof? A walk-in closet? A huge plate of food every single meal?
Probably not...

Can we afford it?
Definitely not!

As per Becoming Minimalist numbers:

Home size has doubled over the last 50 years.  ( Me to add: Did family really doubled in size?)
10% of household have a storage unit somewhere
25% of homeowner have a double garage but yet park outside because garages are full
76% of Americans live pay check to pay check   (Me to add: not only the poor ones)
Average US household credit card debt is 15 191$

How did we get to that point?  Easy, so much money is spent making us believe that we need stuff to be happy, to be better, to be interesting...  but what if happiness and interesting came from within?  What if better really did not matter?

What if all this was in fact a trick to make the rich, richer?  and the poor, poorer?  and all of us in between poorer and more in debt?  What if the only ones that really benefited from that were the richest people in the world? 

You can choose otherwise.  You can choose to be free from stuff.  You can choose to do work you love.  You can choose to go debt free.  You can choose to retire early.  You can choose to live a simpler more meaningful life.  It's your life.  Do not let anyone chose for you from now on. Be strong.

thanks for reading!  and sharing!

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786


Monday, April 14, 2014

Remodelling my bedroom the savvy way


For years now I have this picture frame that I made myself using an old Buddhist calendar, scissors and a glue stick.  I long wanted my bedroom to be inspired by that but I was missing on how I could do it with minimal expenses. I could not exactly picture what I wanted to do.
Wall painting or tapestry are expensive... and it is usually how I decorate.

Then. one day, I woke up with an image!  I had found it!  Inspiration was there.

These are pictures of my bedroom before.




It was "dark" and did not reflect my actual "free" frame of mind!  I wanted something more free spirited, bohemian and Buddhist like...  And I think I manage to do it this week end!

These pictures are a sample of the chalk paint I use from Annie Sloan and me at work Saturday.



This is my bedroom after.  There is no new furniture.  The table used for the reading/tea corner was already in my home. I only use it for something else now. Buddha, salt lamp, candles...  nothing new there either.

Have a look at my new room and I will tell you after what the new items are and their costs.



 



Summary of this transformation:

1) painted my drawer set :  1/2 a can of paint that cost my 49.99$
2) bed cover - got into a fair trade store - from India - 49.99$ on special
3) Cushion on bed also made in India - 29.99$

All I am missing to complete this transformation is new window treatment but I will use something I have in another room... I just didn't have time to do it before writing this post. This will cost me 0$
I also need to go back to the store where I got my cushion to get 2 more cushions that we can use to sit on the floor in the reading/tea corner. They were a little more expensive -let's say around 60$ each... maybe I can negotiate a little.  We'll see. Therefore, all in all, it will have cost me roughly 225$ to have my dream come true bedroom!!!

Anything else was just shuffling stuff around!

It took me roughly 2 hours to paint - I love to use that paint for furniture!

See how easy it can be to redecorate?  And if you, unlike me, have a lot of stuff, it can even be cheaper...  And worth doing before your next decluttering exercise! Do not hesitate to switch usage of a piece of furniture... or move your stuff around!  Sometimes, it's all that it takes for a new perspective.

Let me know if you have questions of what ideas....

thanks for reading!  and sharing!

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786

Friday, April 11, 2014

Milestones of my adult life - why I am who I am


Hello!  This is me in the above picture.

I am 41 years old.... 

Today, for some reason, the last few years of my life flashed back into my head...  to be more precise, the last 13 years...  up until I gave birth to my son.  Little did I know at that time WHY this was going to be a milestone of my life. It was NOT because I had just gave birth and was a parent.

This flash gave me the idea  to write this post, because in a few months, there will be another major milestone in my life (I can't mention it here just yet). I will sometimes mid-may. 

I realised that those milestones, actually made me who I am today!  And if you had asked my 20 years ago where I saw myself at 41, the answer would NOT have been where I am now, but now that I come to think of it, it's much better than what I expected from my life.

Twenty years ago I assume that by the age of 40:

have a paid house - huge house - full of stuff
have 5 kids
be perfectly healthy
go on a trip twice a year - Down south during winter and Europe during summer
have a car
have a full retirement plan
be debt free - didn't even know what debt felt like
be a director/manager in the pharma industry

Reality is:

I do not have a house - but a small apartment
only 1 kid - but the loveliest one - of course
I am perfectly healthy - although technically I have MS!
I do not go on trips - I make my life an adventure - no need for down south or Europe
I have a private driver - he drives a city bus! lol
I have a retirement plan - not as full as I expected but good enough
I am almost debt free
I am unemployed :-)

And you know what...  what I did not think about at around twenty was how I would like to feel at 40!  Well, maybe my reality is different than my naive projections but I:

am in love
am happy
am free
have lots of spare time
and I would not change my life for what I had projected in a million years.

What where the milestone that made me who I am?

In 2000 I gave birth to my one and only son and almost did not make it - Seriously
In 2002 I felt in love with the man of my dreams  -  we got married
In 2003 I was diagnosed with MS - that was hell
In 2006 I decided that I had enough and MS was taking the high way
In 2006 I lost my secure job and thought that was the end of my life - but quite the opposite
In 2006 I opened a gym and was sure that would make me a millionaire - naive I know
In 2007 I sold my house and moved into an apartment - to save the gym
In 2007 I closed the gym and went bankrupt
In 2010 I wrote an article on how yoga helped my deal with MS for Maryse
In 2011 I started this blog
In 2012 I lost another job
In 2013 I published "Life Happens"
In 2013 I lost my job again

and here I am...  with you guys!  writing and writing some more and not knowing where my life is going but you know what?  I don't really care anymore... (not in a bad way) Every time I assumed something bad was happening to me (dying, MS, loosing job, selling house, closing gym, bankruptcy) it ended up being quite positive in the end!  I have learned to let go and see things for what they are - not bad, not good - just experiences and lessons.

Do I have something to do with it?  I like to think so...  I mean, I made the best out of those things: because of my attitude! I always believed there was more, there was something else: believed there was a reason. Because I still believe that there is a reason why I am here (on this planet in that body) and that every time a door closes and I chose another one, I am getting closer to the reason. Because I believe that the sums of all my experiences make me stronger and smarter and wiser... and direct me in a way... in a direction bigger and better the Universe has for me than what I had imagined... 

There is no loss, no grief... Only people/experiences that passed into your life and brought you something - Now you have to figure out what!

There is no failure...  There again: only experiences to learn from.

It's up to you to take things for what they are.  Neither negative nor positive in the end.  Who decides what is positive and what is negative? Everything can be positive - it brings you forward.

You need to change your perspective... your outlook on life...

And if you are not feeling good with someone or a situation or in a specific place, change the way you see it... and if it is still not working out, walk away! Period.

I know life still has surprise for me.  I hope it does.
I know I will try and make the best out of it.  It is who I decided to be.

You too can make that choice.

thanks for reading!  and sharing!

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786

Thursday, April 10, 2014

Vegan Thursday



Thursday is going to be my vegan writing day from now on... after all I am Minimalist Vegan Nath!

I am not here to brain wash anyone nor tell you  you're wrong or bad for eating meat...  this is not like me!  However, I wish to share with you my experiment in becoming vegetarian years ago and gradually vegan! How my health improved and what I learned to cook. I am also here to answer any specific questions you guys may have... I am a self taught nutritionist! I am here to open your horizon.  After all, we all like to try new food right?  Whether it's Mexican, Moroccan, Portuguese, Russian, African....  why not try vegan stuff???  What have you got to loose???

I have been vegan for a little over a year but never wrote much about it here... because I could not find my "voice" to do it.  I didn't know how to approach it without sounding like an extremist or a crazy person.  As vegan, we often get this label affixed to us. I did do a few post about my conviction on nutrition but I wish to step up to be true to myself and my vegan readers.

In today's post, I wish to address one common misconception there is against vegans:  we do not eat only grass, lettuce and fruits!  Actually, we eat just like you guys!  ANYTHING can be veganized!

As a proof, I will invite you to look at my post here and try this  vegan alfredo sauce recipe.  It can also be turned into a carbonara sauce! It is just delicious!!!

Yes we can make sandwiches, burgers, hot dogs, sausage...  we can have "meat" tacos... and even pepperoni pizza!

I also want to share with you all the other non-regular stuff that we do eat.  That might put you out of your comfort zone.  It's always good to step out of our comfort zone!

I am inviting you, if you are in the Montreal area, to go and try a pastry or a meal at Sophie Sucree .  It is own b y a friend of mine and she is amazing.  My supper tonight is actually a BLT sandwich that comes from her place. Bacon is made with coconut believe it or not!   See, we do eat normal stuff!!! She has all kinds of cupcakes, pecan pie, brownies, chocolate...   

Is there anything you would like me to address in future post about vegetarianism or veganism nutrition wise?   Anything that worries  you health wise? Do you want me to share recipes?
If there is anything you wish to know/or ask but not as a comment to this post, you can write it here.  Only me will get to see it.

In any case, you can check out my eBook here.  It was launched 2 weeks ago and it is selling well.  You'll find nutritional facts about veganism as well as recipes and tricks to make it easy and inexpensive!

thanks for reading!  and sharing!

love&peace,
nath
xox

http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=734016786