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Wednesday, April 24, 2013

My life

Part of the tapestry in my yoga room - was hand made in India in a fair trade manner
 
 The 2 most frequent comments I get from people reading  "Life Happens"  is 1) that I am a really strong woman and 2) that I have to make a lot of sacrifices

Unfortunately, I do not see it exactly like that and those comments always surprise me...

For 1)...  being a strong woman....  I never realized it before I started getting the comment...  honestly! I never really asked myself that question while going thru all that...  "Am I a strong woman?"  I just did what I had to do... what I felt I had to do... I do not know what pushed me really...  why I did it where other would have just give up...   I think part of it was that I didn't want to be sick...  I didn't want to be a burden to my lovely husband and son... I didn't want to end up as I might have.... I was to young...  I am also very stubborn.... boy what I can do to prove someone wrong... but it that case it came in handy!!!  I was also terrified...  and it's amazing what being scary... feeling like you're fighting for your life can do!!!  I felt like I had no choice... and I also think, that everyone CAN and SHOULD do it!!!  Why give up???  Why believe what the first doctor tells you?  Why listen to people who tell you there is nothing to do...  It is not their decision to make!!!  It is YOUR LIFE!!!  Why let anyone tells you what the outcome of YOUR LIFE will be???  it is your to decide...  and there are so many amazing story of people like me who overcame chronic diseases when there was no hope...  cancer when chemo was not even useful...  I am not the only one... and this is what supported me... I think I may also be a tad competitive... that too came in handy! ;-) If they could do it, why couldn't I???

So, to this day, even thus I take it as a compliment, I do not see myself as any stronger than any of you reading this or Life Happens... perhaps, some of you are lacking the tools or the directions...  and this is why Life Happens is there...  to give you a hint..  a place to look into... a ray of HOPE!

Now if we look at comment 2)...  that I have to make a lot of sacrifices...  I am not so sure... The definition of sacrifice is to give up something you value...  but is it really a sacrifice if what you give up was not of true value?  if you do not miss what you gave up?  if what you gave up brought you love, peace and health???
Here's what I gave up to regain my life and my health:

Meat
and eventually dairy because since the book came out I became vegan
Stuff - a big house, a car, furniture, clothes, objects...
Addiction to buying more stuff
Dependence on money for happiness
Lack of discipline

and what did I trade that in for...

Better eating
More time
No need to do a job to have a big income - being able to choose a job
Happiness being found in every free moment of life
Discipline - to get what I want - my health and peace of mind!
Discipline to develop a meditation and yoga practice that is so rewarding!

So is it really a sacrifice?  Do I miss any of those things?  NO!!!  REALLY NOT!!!!
I am so much better off....

but some might argue that I cannot go out in "normal" places...  or go shopping if I am having a bad day...  or invite people over because I live in a very small place...  take a road trip...

I want to specify that I CAN do all those things....  if I wanted too... but I CHOOSE not to! 

but I do not want to do those things...  I can go out mostly anywhere if I want to...  there is almost always one option for vegan...  if I am having a bad day, I'd rather go home and get a hug from my husband and my son... than off to the mall!  I can have people over but we can't have a four course meal on my tiny dinning table...  but there is more than enough floor space to sit or stand and chat!  I have been in a car... and road trip always nauseated me!!! Rather go for a walk, but trip or bike ride!

This is my life... I do not see it as a sacrifice...  I made choices.... no one forced me to do it!  But the outcome is so GREAT that I hardly think  of it...  and remember, I did not do all of it over night... it took years...  it was a slow process...  it was self-encouraged as in each step I felt a little better....  so why stop?  take the next step!  If ever I get to a step that does not make me happy I will not make it!

For example, I was vegetarian for almost 6 years and contemplating being vegan for 2 before actually doing it... because before that step was uncomfortable to me...  I did not make it until recently...

So in the end, maybe I come off as a strong woman who makes lots of sacrifice...  but this is not how I see myself... and this is what keeps me going...  If you see it as sacrificing or loosing something it is unbearable!!!  You have to look at the glass half full!!!  Period!


love and peace,
nath
xox
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